Describe a brutal serial killer about to murder someone but with the enthusiasm and likelihood of sports commentators

Ladies and gentleman, here he is again! 180 pounds of evil, 6 ft and 3 inches of terror, THE NEW YORK SLASHER HIMSELF, ALLLLLLAAANNNNNNNN MAVRIDDDDDDD!This is it Joe, Alan has been stalking his latest victim for over an hour now and it seems like she is about to leave the bar, things are about to heat up!
Oh boy, Tom, you can see she has a badge on her belt though, perhaps Alan has himself out-matched this time! A police officer isn’t an easy target, he’s going for style points now!

Well now, Joe, Alan is no stranger to the game, at 14 clean kills in just 3 months he has established quite the reputation for himself. Oh! Look at that! He got out of the car and is following her, and what’s that? A knife! Wow! He is really going personal this time!
Hold on Tom, she’s turning around! Has she already gotten suspicious? Ladies and gentleman, we may have ourselves a failed attempt just minutes in! Alan is sweating, he clearly is bothered by this. He’s still going though! He hasn’t changed paths!

Whoa! Such determination, we are seeing one of the greatest serial killers NYC has to offer right now, he isn’t stopping for anything! And look at that! She appears to have not only sensed nothing amiss but she is turning into the nearby alley! This may be the fastest kill yet!
That’s right Joe, and just a few seconds left until Alan is turning into the very same alley! He is taking out his knife now! No hiding what’s about to come!

Absolutely, Tom, and for the viewers at home you have to realize what has to be going through his mind right now, he is just 2 kills away from reaching the record 16 kills held by the mysterious Ms. Scarlet who boldly leaves a red letter ‘S’ carved into her victims! By tonight’s end Alan may just make it in serial killer fame! He’s entered the alley now! Will he give his famous one-liner when he turns the corner or will he just rush straight at her? We’re about to find out!

Hold the phone, Joe! Look at this! She was waiting at the corner! Oh!! Oh my god!! She has a knife of her own! Oh my goodness! She is stabbing Alan in the chest!! Alan is caught totally off-guard! Who could have seen this coming? This has never happened before!

Alan isn’t dead yet, Joe! Take a look! He slashed her ankle! And oh! She goes DOWN! They are tossing around swipes and both trying to slay the other! Wow! You have to hand it to her, holding her own against the New York Terror himself! Oh and Alan tackles her! This has to be it! He is on top of her with his knife just inches from her face!

It’s still not over! Tom, she appears to have a second knife! What are the chances! Alan is caught completely off-guard yet again! She appears to have slashed his neck! He’s down! Another stab! She’s on top now! SHE’S ABOUT TO DO THE IMPOSSIBLE! OH! OH! SHE’S DONE IT! HE’S DEAD! MAKING HISTORY SHE HAS KILLED THE NEW YORK TERROR! Wait! What’s this! She is taking off his shirt! Could she be?

THIS IS IT JOE! SHE IS CARVING A LETTER ‘S’ INTO HIS CHEST! MS. SCARLET IN THE FLESH! WE KNEW SHE WAS GOOD BUT WOW! BAITING AND SLAYING THE NEW YORK TERROR IN JUST MINUTES! THIS HAS BEEN A HISTORIC NIGHT!

Wow, well what a show. Amazing. We’ll have to tune in next week to see how she handles the Halloween challenge special! Thank you all for watching and we’ll see you next time!

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